The War of the Heart

How exactly do you guard your heart and still be open to what God is going to do?  Good question.

I think the answer lies in Proverbs 4:23 itself.  In the NIV it says “Guard your heart, for everything else flows from it.”  The ESV says “Keep your heart with all vigilance.”  That’s better.  It's closer to the original language, which tells you what to do, and how to do it.

What do you keep? 

Do you keep boarding passes from a trip?  Or fortunes from the fortune cookies?  Do you keep encouraging notes that from friends that came just at the right moment?  Do you keep photos in boxes or in back-up files on your external hard-drive? 

Me?  I have three strings of pearls.  OK – not real, real pearls… but they’re as close as I’ll ever get.  One strand was worn by my paternal grandmother.  One was worn from my maternal grandmother.  One was a gift from my own mother.

I keep them.  I have a special place for them.  I don’t throw them in the bottom of my closet or in my junk bowl by the front door.  I don’t just throw them down when they’re bothering me.  I don’t just toss them on the park bench while I’m reading.  I don’t let them get thrown away.  I don’t let little babies chew on them.  I’m a little jealous of them – and I don’t know if I even want you to play with them.  I wipe the dust off them.  I like to look at them and see them every day as I get dressed.  I keep them.

Do you hear these ideas in this “keep” word?  I protect.  I maintain.  I preserve.  I observe.  They are all found in the Greek word.

How do we do this?  Well, let’s go to the vigilance word… one that means that watching and guarding with diligence… literally – it means the man at the prison.  You wanna come in – you need to go through him.  You wanna go out – you gotta go through him.

This is where we fail.  We want to keep our hearts, fine… but we are lazy about it.  We want it to be easy and we want to feel good about it.  But it’s not really like that.  It’s work.  “House keeping” is only really fun if someone else is cleaning the toilets and mopping the floors every day.  Being a house wife is a recognized job by the government in Italy – and for good reason.  It is a job.  And to do it well, you have to be vigilant.

So, how do you keep something with vigilance?  Especially your heart?  Especially when hormones and emotions and ticking clocks are swirling around you?

Let’s go back to Proverbs 4 and let’s start singing a very appropriate children’s church song: Oh, be careful little eyes what you see… oh be careful little mouth what you say… feet where you go… Hmmm… OK – that’s great for a sermon outline.  But what about HIM.  You know, the Guy.  The Great Guy.  The Really Great Guy.

We are talking about him. Well, really, we’re talking about you.

1.      ...Be careful little eyes:  Look towards God.  He is Your Eternity.  You’ve given your heart to Him and He knows your needs.  He loves you and through His love He will bring glory to Himself.  Don’t trust yourself with this – trust Him.  I know, I know… easier said than done.  So you say it.  You say it again and again and again.  You say it every time you go to the bathroom.  You say it every time you have contact with him.  You say it every time you’re not having contact with him but wish you were.  Preach it, sister!  Preach it to yourself.

2.      ...Be careful little mouth: Quit talking about him.  To your girl-friends.  (Ask them to pray, you can’t go at this alone – it’s a battle, we’re talking about! – and then leave it be.)  And quit talking to yourself.  I know, I know… it is so very hard.  But, the more you dream up things – the more dangerous this gets.  The more you analyze every little thing he says and does, the more … well, you’re just making him into a little idol.  Fill your mind with scripture, sermons… the needs of the people around you. Keep going back to Philippians 4:8. 

3.     ... Be careful little ears: Turn the dial.  Ba-a-ad theology comes straight from the country music station.  And the pop one, too.  Turn off the sappy songs and turn on the worship music.  Don’t watch that chick-flick even though it would feel good for a few minutes.  And that book, you might need to put it down, too.  Anything that is saying “You have to have a significant other to be happy” is trash.  Get rid of it. 

4.     ... Be careful little feet: Pay attention to what you’re doing.  Oohhh… I’m not in the camp of Don’t Say Hi First.  But, I am in the camp of Don’t Call Him Eight Times in One Day.  Remember those words we looked at earlier,  keep and vigilance? They both have the idea of PAYING ATTENTION.  Pay attention to what you are doing.  If your best friend were doing the same thing, what would you say to her?

Now – take a deep breath.  You’re not alone.  God wants what is best for you.  He wants to equip you with the strength you need.  He will be faithful.

And that boy?  Put on some lip gloss.  Laugh at his jokes (only if they’re funny, though.)  Don’t ignore him when he wants to chat on line with you.  But remember the words of my dear mother: If it’s going to happen, it’s going to happen.  You can’t make it happen.  Only God will do it.  So relax and don’t forget a spritz of perfume. 

And give yourself some grace.  In all honesty, I stunk at all of this… several times over.  Especially with my own Dave.  Eyeyeyeee… but, I’m growing.  I’m maturing.  And all this stuff is still true – now that I’m not thinking about a boy but thinking about marriage and kids and moving and my life completely changing…  I still need to guard my heart.  To guard it from fear… to guard it from me wanting to control everything… to guard it from becoming proud or lazy… to guard it from being weak or calloused… and yes, even to guard it from worshiping that same boy. 

Grace.  Hope.  God’s faithfulness.  Jesus.  In the end, that’s how a heart gets guarded.  And that's how the battle is won.